Rethinking Narcissism The Secret To Recognizing And Coping With Narcissists Best Verified Jun 2026

Projecting their own negative feelings (like shame) onto you so they don't have to feel them.

Based on Dr. Craig Malkin’s book, Rethinking Narcissism: The Secret to Recognizing and Coping with Narcissists Projecting their own negative feelings (like shame) onto

Narcissists love to hook you into defending your reality. Refuse the hook. Refuse the hook

Narcissists thrive on "narcissistic supply"—your attention, your anger, and your emotional reactions. By becoming as uninteresting as a gray rock, you cut off that supply. Give short, non-committal answers ("Mhm," "I see," "Okay"). Don't share personal news or vulnerabilities. Keep conversations strictly functional. Give short, non-committal answers ("Mhm," "I see," "Okay")

Instead of attacking their behavior, try "I" statements that emphasize your feelings and your desire for connection. For example: "I feel lonely when we don't talk about our day; it would mean a lot to me if we could." If they respond with empathy, change is possible.

Coping with a narcissist requires distinguishing between those who can change and those who cannot.